New personal record

I ran half a marathon yesterday !!! That should feel great, shouldn't it? I mean, it's a good achievement and it's a new personal record.

But when it's about me i can't be 100% happy about it, because i can't tell alot of people. I can't tell my family because they would think I overdid it again and that i'm far away from being cured from Bulimia. I can't tell alot of my friends either because they'd think the same as my parents. I can tell Sarah, and im gonna have to tell Sarah because i tell her everything about my eating and exercising so that we can analyze and see how far i've gotten and what we gotta change in order for me to handle my habits.

But it's just so sad, because sure when i first started running, i was running for compensation. But then it all just felt so smooth so i kept running and ran twice the distance i was gonna run. And then i ran some more and then some more and then i ended up wanting to break my record !! Which i did :) And then it wasn't about burning calories anymore, then it was to boost my self-confidence by breaking my PT !!

So maybe it's all good, because now i ran for a different reason.. and to be honest it felt awesome !! I'm left indifferent after a run because i do it so often and it's a part of my routine to lose weight. So when i finish a run i just go whatever, now i compensated. But now it was such a great achievement, it's been a long time since the last time i felt good over something i did !!